Today I am… Thinking. Yes, thinking of how my life is playing out, and it really is not so bad. In fact when I take a long deep look, I am making more out of it than it really is. The truth is, I am making it harder for myself by hanging on to those thoughts of the past. I have had problems with letting go in the past, and I have been working on that problem, it is slow coming, but it is coming around in my head finally. The tears, the heartache’s, the dark days. Well they come and go, and each day I feel a bit stronger than the last. I see a bit more than the last, and I understand a bit more than the last. I would say that is growth; wouldn’t you?
I look around and I really have nothing to complain about, I am living in the city that I want to be in, I have an apartment, and new people are coming into my life and into my path, I am having new and first experiences and adventures. Yes, I know it is not the way I had envisioned it all going, but it is life moving ahead for me. I have employment, and I have opportunities to go forward in life as well. I look around me and see lots of people who are not well off, who have true problems, and I look at myself and say, heck, I do not need to complain about my pettiness. One thing I am working on as well.
I am learning more and more about myself in this time of being. Yes, things I do not like, but it is always a work in progress, and things that I adore about myself, those unique things and quirks that I have that makes me smile and know that I am something special, that God has made me very special. life’s lesson, and school is always in. Just a little of I am learning.
Today I am… Thinking.