Month: November 2016

My Corner…

Another evening here at the hospital.  Today was my day off from work, so spent it taking care of business,before heading up to the hospital.  As I quietly sit and type this out; what comes to mind is how are we, meaning I coping with all this.  I figured some day I would have to assist my parents, or care for them.  I guess I never thought it would be this soon.  But it is something that I have to go through and learn, because at this point, my family and I will be caring for her, in this capacity.  At times, I mean mostly I feel very overwhelmed.  Like I can’t…  I know I can, and will.

Life has so many facets.  I don’t know anyone who is prepared for this, there are so many things that need to be done as well.  Things we do not want to discuss, but have to follow up on them.  Very important.  Life is so very precious, love hard and forgive quickly.

Just another night here at the hospital.  

My Corner…

Another worth while day with mom.  I get to spend more time on Sundays,because I have that day off.  Anyway, life is chugging along, they have spaced out her medication, the pain is not like it was in the begining.  Still not walking or able to stand; but in time and with much physical therapy this will be possible.  

All this is what is called adversity, we all eventually go through something of it.  How we deal and handle it is the other thing.  I was watching Dr. Stanleys program on adversity, what he said is so very true…  God does not give you more than you can handle.  He knows what you can and can not, and at which times as well.  I know that if these things had come up at another time in my life, it may have been too much, but God knew, I know I am so much stronger for it.  To God I give all the Glory and Praise!

Well, getting my time in with mom.  that is all that is going on in My Corner.  Enjoy your day.

My Corner…

It feels like  the worse pain, mom being in the hospital this way.  At the moment she is suffering from what is called Chemo Brain.

Post-chemotherapy cognitive impairment

Post-chemotherapy cognitive impairment describes the cognitive impairment that can result from chemotherapy treatment. Approximately 20–30% of people who undergo chemotherapy experience some level of post-chemotherapy cognitive impairment. The phenomenon first came to light because of the large number of breast cancer survivors who complained of changes in memory, fluency, and other cognitive abilities that impeded their ability to function as they had pre-chemotherapy.
Right now things are so fuzzy with her short term memory, it is all over the place, and she has said some things  that sounds like she is giving up.  We are not giving up on her, never giving up on her.  These tears may fall, and believe me they are falling like waterfalls, but I am going to do all that I can to encourage her to fight this fight, that she has so much to live for.  I feel at a loss, but I can not give up.  I won’t give up.

My Corner…

Today is Thanksgiving 2016, this is the first holiday spent at the hospital.  I feel so lost, sitting here in the waiting room, because sitting there in moms room is a lot to take.  Trying to keep strong and not cry, but who am I fooling; certainly not these tears.  Not myself or even mom.  Here I am though,trying one min at a time.  Looking out over the top of the buildings, nothing but pale blue skies.  A beautiful Saturday, that should be spent enjoying great things with mom, instead here at this place,yeah what memories this will make.

I am not the only one, there are millions of families going through the same things or worse, but when it happens to your family it feels like your the only one.  I know that This family has the love of God, of family and friends, and even people who have just met you.  I write to alleviate the pain of this, it is my outlet, at least with this I can cry and not have to explain why.  It is difficult to talk and keep from tearing up.  Even though I know I have friends that will be there just to listen, no explinations of any kind needed.  I find a kind of solice in writing,something I need to do more of, get back to.  I am scared, I need to get back into the Word, that is what is going to keep me balanced in this time.   

This has been a year of ups and downs, I pray the 2017 year holds nothing but blessings and greatness.  Just writing this, has calmed my soul.  looking out over these buildings, peaceful and calm.  seeing the colors of the trees changing as with this weather.  Hold the the ones you love close and tell them you love them.  We never know how things will change.  Be thankful for all you have and whom you have.  So, now the tears have dried up;and I can see clearly.  Time to get my strength and conquer this fear, to move forward and keep on keeping on, because mom needs to know and feel that we as a family has her, and is onboard with her well being.  That means I need to step up.  To grow beyond what I am, I know I can. 

This has been My Corner…  Until the next time.  Happy Thanksgiving . 

Early Morning Silence…

What I love about the early mornings in my life; are that it is filled with peace and semi-silence.  Here I am sitting out at the park next to Central Market, waiting for the time when have to be on the grind.  it is relatively quiet.  There is bustling from time to time, with joggers on the trails, and the engine hum from the truck waiting to unload; otherwise  it is a nice morning.  I so love the early morning hours.

The weather is nice at the moment, but the gray of the clouds are moving in.  weather is about to turn cold.  

Glitches in my mom’s move to the rehab, her platelets were too low, so they gave her another round of blood, and is keeping her at the hospital.  She will be there all this week, and weekend.  They will see what’s what after.  I terribly hate what is going on with her, to see her in such pain.  Family, friends, and prayers is what keeps me sane.  To God goes the glory.  

Yesterday I had my first Chai Latte in a year.  From Central market of course.  I am about to walk over and get me one before work.  I have definitely missed them.  

So I shall enjoy my quiet time this morning, and I hope your day is filled with some quietness as well.  Until the next time, enjoy.

On the move…

My mom that is, today is probably her last day staying at the hospital at St. David’s Round Rock, she will be moving into a Rehab facility for a week or so.  Senior Care home, where they will continue to work with getting her up on her feet, so that she may come home.  I am totally exhausted, and I know she is as well.  It is no fun, when the one you love is ill.  I try to hold back the tears in the presence of others, and even mom, but when I go home, I cry silently.  It is so very hard.  She is making some progress, I pray to God every day and night, and along the day.  I know prayer changes things.

I took the day off work today, so that I could get some things done around their apartment, you know, laundry, and cooking and cleaning it up.  Especially for my dad, so that when he comes in, he won’t have to worry about any thing, and we can go strait to the hospital to see mom.  Usually I get to see her when I get out of work on the days I leave around 5:30, otherwise, I get out around 8 and that’s just way to late to be heading there.  I don’t complain, it’s all good.  I have employment, and I am a bit closer to home, so at the moment it works out.

I really, hope that they can get her some home health care that is within her coverage, praying everyday, because she is definitely going to need it to get better once she is totally released and sent home.

That is it for now, until the next update.  Hope your day is going well.