Today I am… Finding it difficult. To keep long thoughts of him in my head, in my mind. I should be very happy about this right? is that some sign that I am slowly letting go of him inside of me? I don’t know. I have moments where I don’t think about him, and then have moments where it is just in bits and pieces. In those moments where my thoughts are of him, I find myself googling him, yes, don’t judge, I am sure you’ve been there as well. It is not an always kind of thing. You know what happens when you go looking, you always find things you don’t want to, well looks like he is doing his own thing now, apparently he is on Hot or Not, and well let’s just say, so unoriginal, the photos he is using at least 3 of them are photos I took of him, funny, how for me when I took them they meant something, but now he’s using them on that site. It is kind of funny in a way, because it just reminds me of dating sites where guys will have pictures up, with another woman clearly, but they have cut them out of the photo, or it is a photo from way back. Funny, but sad.
Anyway, enough of that, I know it comes in bits and pieces, and it’s like my mind is telling me that I aint got no time for that, life is busy enough. Work, work, work, and figuring out things I want to do, and places I want to go and see, it is the in-between things that it seeps in. Tis life, right. Tis life.
So the start of the new work week is here, and I am on the second shift, ugh! I don’t get out till 9 tonight, then will not get home till almost 11, then it is off to bed, to start the next day. Yes, somewhere in there I will have a little time to eat, bathe and watch a movie or something on Netflix to wind down. Oh life, such a crazy thing it be.
Looks like rain today, so umbrella time, the weather I wish was more dry, oh my, to get acclimated to this stuff has been difficult to say. To be continued… Welp for now, must get a move on, time is pouring away, and I need to get dressed and out of this place, until the next time…
Today I am… Finding it difficult.