Category: prayer

Praise Him!

Church was stellar today, life class equally refreshing.  Just listing to praise and worship songs on pandora, makes me cry, these songs are the songs we both loved,and sang in church, and with one anither, they fill my heart.  I know she woul be happy right now knowing I am in church, that we all are in church.  Getting closer to God, His Word.  Today I am starting Proverbs in the Bible, I will read a passage each day.  God has done so much for my soul and spirit, in these times.  It is I who must draw closer to him.

I totally admire my friend Olivia, who went to Honduras, mission work.  God is totally blessing this woman, she is truly the church in this world.  I have been thinking of volunteering in the church bookstore.  To be continued…

I know there are some major areas in my life that need cleaning up, I pray to God everyday to guide my steps, to give me discernment, and give me wisdom to see the truth of things, to send the ones that are supposed to be in my life, and the ones that are not to remove the ones that do not belong.  

Did God remove mom from my life, because of a journey I need to be on, without her, I do wonder, but there are roads we have to walk.  We will never be alone, because He is with us.  Gods reasons are not our reasons.  A time,and season for all. It has been 4 Sundays since she passed.  I cried today.  It will get better, this I know in my soul.

I love you mom.

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My Corner…

What I see…

Looking out the waiting room window, today is a cold,wet,gray kind of day.  It is Sunday, and me and dad are at the hospital visiting mom.  She is in a state, upset about things, no details, but very upset.  I hate seeing her this way, I pray this does not last the whole day.  I really do not like hospitals, but here I am, rveryday with pop in tow, coming to see my mom.  I love this woman, and want her to get better, and stronger. Emotionally I do not know where I an at, I suppose all over the place, just trying to hold it together.  I will get there, I will get there.

My Corner…

Another worth while day with mom.  I get to spend more time on Sundays,because I have that day off.  Anyway, life is chugging along, they have spaced out her medication, the pain is not like it was in the begining.  Still not walking or able to stand; but in time and with much physical therapy this will be possible.  

All this is what is called adversity, we all eventually go through something of it.  How we deal and handle it is the other thing.  I was watching Dr. Stanleys program on adversity, what he said is so very true…  God does not give you more than you can handle.  He knows what you can and can not, and at which times as well.  I know that if these things had come up at another time in my life, it may have been too much, but God knew, I know I am so much stronger for it.  To God I give all the Glory and Praise!

Well, getting my time in with mom.  that is all that is going on in My Corner.  Enjoy your day.

My Corner…

Today is Thanksgiving 2016, this is the first holiday spent at the hospital.  I feel so lost, sitting here in the waiting room, because sitting there in moms room is a lot to take.  Trying to keep strong and not cry, but who am I fooling; certainly not these tears.  Not myself or even mom.  Here I am though,trying one min at a time.  Looking out over the top of the buildings, nothing but pale blue skies.  A beautiful Saturday, that should be spent enjoying great things with mom, instead here at this place,yeah what memories this will make.

I am not the only one, there are millions of families going through the same things or worse, but when it happens to your family it feels like your the only one.  I know that This family has the love of God, of family and friends, and even people who have just met you.  I write to alleviate the pain of this, it is my outlet, at least with this I can cry and not have to explain why.  It is difficult to talk and keep from tearing up.  Even though I know I have friends that will be there just to listen, no explinations of any kind needed.  I find a kind of solice in writing,something I need to do more of, get back to.  I am scared, I need to get back into the Word, that is what is going to keep me balanced in this time.   

This has been a year of ups and downs, I pray the 2017 year holds nothing but blessings and greatness.  Just writing this, has calmed my soul.  looking out over these buildings, peaceful and calm.  seeing the colors of the trees changing as with this weather.  Hold the the ones you love close and tell them you love them.  We never know how things will change.  Be thankful for all you have and whom you have.  So, now the tears have dried up;and I can see clearly.  Time to get my strength and conquer this fear, to move forward and keep on keeping on, because mom needs to know and feel that we as a family has her, and is onboard with her well being.  That means I need to step up.  To grow beyond what I am, I know I can. 

This has been My Corner…  Until the next time.  Happy Thanksgiving . 

Early Morning Silence…

What I love about the early mornings in my life; are that it is filled with peace and semi-silence.  Here I am sitting out at the park next to Central Market, waiting for the time when have to be on the grind.  it is relatively quiet.  There is bustling from time to time, with joggers on the trails, and the engine hum from the truck waiting to unload; otherwise  it is a nice morning.  I so love the early morning hours.

The weather is nice at the moment, but the gray of the clouds are moving in.  weather is about to turn cold.  

Glitches in my mom’s move to the rehab, her platelets were too low, so they gave her another round of blood, and is keeping her at the hospital.  She will be there all this week, and weekend.  They will see what’s what after.  I terribly hate what is going on with her, to see her in such pain.  Family, friends, and prayers is what keeps me sane.  To God goes the glory.  

Yesterday I had my first Chai Latte in a year.  From Central market of course.  I am about to walk over and get me one before work.  I have definitely missed them.  

So I shall enjoy my quiet time this morning, and I hope your day is filled with some quietness as well.  Until the next time, enjoy.

On the move…

My mom that is, today is probably her last day staying at the hospital at St. David’s Round Rock, she will be moving into a Rehab facility for a week or so.  Senior Care home, where they will continue to work with getting her up on her feet, so that she may come home.  I am totally exhausted, and I know she is as well.  It is no fun, when the one you love is ill.  I try to hold back the tears in the presence of others, and even mom, but when I go home, I cry silently.  It is so very hard.  She is making some progress, I pray to God every day and night, and along the day.  I know prayer changes things.

I took the day off work today, so that I could get some things done around their apartment, you know, laundry, and cooking and cleaning it up.  Especially for my dad, so that when he comes in, he won’t have to worry about any thing, and we can go strait to the hospital to see mom.  Usually I get to see her when I get out of work on the days I leave around 5:30, otherwise, I get out around 8 and that’s just way to late to be heading there.  I don’t complain, it’s all good.  I have employment, and I am a bit closer to home, so at the moment it works out.

I really, hope that they can get her some home health care that is within her coverage, praying everyday, because she is definitely going to need it to get better once she is totally released and sent home.

That is it for now, until the next update.  Hope your day is going well.

Life…

Is precious, when major things happen, it makes you take stock.  Stock in the little things, in the big things, and in the between things. What’s really important.  My mom has been ill for over a month.  First with Gout,then something else that took over her body.  Come to find out she has leukemia.  So she has been in the Hospital since Sunday, and she will be transfered to the hospital in south Austin today., they will get her set up and take it from there.  Am I scared;yes I am.  We have to stay strong as a family unit, keep strong for her.  So much is going through my mind, but no time to process it all.  I work everyday, and my mind races.  My dad took time off to be with his wife,to which I commend,he needs that, she needs that. I know God has his hands of protection around us.  Major changes for this family unit,with God all things are possible.