Church was stellar today, life class equally refreshing. Just listing to praise and worship songs on pandora, makes me cry, these songs are the songs we both loved,and sang in church, and with one anither, they fill my heart. I know she woul be happy right now knowing I am in church, that we all are in church. Getting closer to God, His Word. Today I am starting Proverbs in the Bible, I will read a passage each day. God has done so much for my soul and spirit, in these times. It is I who must draw closer to him.
I totally admire my friend Olivia, who went to Honduras, mission work. God is totally blessing this woman, she is truly the church in this world. I have been thinking of volunteering in the church bookstore. To be continued…
I know there are some major areas in my life that need cleaning up, I pray to God everyday to guide my steps, to give me discernment, and give me wisdom to see the truth of things, to send the ones that are supposed to be in my life, and the ones that are not to remove the ones that do not belong.
Did God remove mom from my life, because of a journey I need to be on, without her, I do wonder, but there are roads we have to walk. We will never be alone, because He is with us. Gods reasons are not our reasons. A time,and season for all. It has been 4 Sundays since she passed. I cried today. It will get better, this I know in my soul.
I love you mom.
It feels like the worse pain, mom being in the hospital this way. At the moment she is suffering from what is called Chemo Brain.
Post-chemotherapy cognitive impairment
Post-chemotherapy cognitive impairment describes the cognitive impairment that can result from chemotherapy treatment. Approximately 20–30% of people who undergo chemotherapy experience some level of post-chemotherapy cognitive impairment. The phenomenon first came to light because of the large number of breast cancer survivors who complained of changes in memory, fluency, and other cognitive abilities that impeded their ability to function as they had pre-chemotherapy.
Right now things are so fuzzy with her short term memory, it is all over the place, and she has said some things that sounds like she is giving up. We are not giving up on her, never giving up on her. These tears may fall, and believe me they are falling like waterfalls, but I am going to do all that I can to encourage her to fight this fight, that she has so much to live for. I feel at a loss, but I can not give up. I won’t give up.
Tonight, my mom has been released from the hospital. Yay! She has to do some follow ups, and they are somewhere down town, but we will take a taxi to get her to them. I am glad she is coming home, I have missed her so much, you know… You don’t know what you got until something happens, I know I need to be a bit more patient with her, I am working on that. I love my mom very much. I want to have more good times than the not so good times with her, as much as I can.
she is pretty much medicated to the hilt, so hopefully she sleeps well tonight, without much pain. Got all her meds filled, and believe me there are a lot of them. My oh my! Anyway, that is the latest on my mom.
So today I stayed home and cleaned her apartment, so that it will be much easier for her to maneuver around her apartment, being there were lots of things that I had to put away. I am tired now. I did happen to get in the rest of The Get Down on netflix. It is a awesome show, season 1. I do hope there will be a season two, just have to wait and see. Well that is about it for tonight, so until the next time. Keep it nice and easy.
Is precious, when major things happen, it makes you take stock. Stock in the little things, in the big things, and in the between things. What’s really important. My mom has been ill for over a month. First with Gout,then something else that took over her body. Come to find out she has leukemia. So she has been in the Hospital since Sunday, and she will be transfered to the hospital in south Austin today., they will get her set up and take it from there. Am I scared;yes I am. We have to stay strong as a family unit, keep strong for her. So much is going through my mind, but no time to process it all. I work everyday, and my mind races. My dad took time off to be with his wife,to which I commend,he needs that, she needs that. I know God has his hands of protection around us. Major changes for this family unit,with God all things are possible.
Oh my feet!, my feet, they feel so good, these shoes with the memory foam must be magic I say! I have just been on my feet walking home from the bus stop, now I have walked all the way down to the library here, and I say, my feet feel so good. What is this magic, I don’t understand it all, but I am going to walk till I have walked all the memory out of these shoes, and then I am going to purchase another pair, oh my, oh my, this is wonderful!
Just wanted to convey how awesome these sketchers are. That is all my loyal, now you can return back to your regularly scheduled programs. Toodles!
Today I am… Stretching That Dollar! It is payday, and I an stretching that dollar, to do what it needs to do. You all know what I am saying. I am keeping faith, so even though I am stretching, things are being paid. God is good!
Today I am… Stretching That Dollar!
Today I am… In A Battle! With all that is inside of me, the inner demons that try to control my emotional state of being, this is a hard battle, one that I will be victorious over, one that I will fight until I can overcome. I know that sometimes, probably more than not, that I do not make a whole lot of sense with things, but my battle will be won, I will not allow the devil to keep me prisoner of my emotional state. Everyday I pray for blessings, for Grace and to be renewed. To forgive and be forgiven of my sins, I know God hears and does so. God is so good in my life. I will be a victor, and not a victim.
Today I am… In A Battle.