Tag: thoughts

My Corner…

Another evening here at the hospital.  Today was my day off from work, so spent it taking care of business,before heading up to the hospital.  As I quietly sit and type this out; what comes to mind is how are we, meaning I coping with all this.  I figured some day I would have to assist my parents, or care for them.  I guess I never thought it would be this soon.  But it is something that I have to go through and learn, because at this point, my family and I will be caring for her, in this capacity.  At times, I mean mostly I feel very overwhelmed.  Like I can’t…  I know I can, and will.

Life has so many facets.  I don’t know anyone who is prepared for this, there are so many things that need to be done as well.  Things we do not want to discuss, but have to follow up on them.  Very important.  Life is so very precious, love hard and forgive quickly.

Just another night here at the hospital.  

My Corner…

Today is Thanksgiving 2016, this is the first holiday spent at the hospital.  I feel so lost, sitting here in the waiting room, because sitting there in moms room is a lot to take.  Trying to keep strong and not cry, but who am I fooling; certainly not these tears.  Not myself or even mom.  Here I am though,trying one min at a time.  Looking out over the top of the buildings, nothing but pale blue skies.  A beautiful Saturday, that should be spent enjoying great things with mom, instead here at this place,yeah what memories this will make.

I am not the only one, there are millions of families going through the same things or worse, but when it happens to your family it feels like your the only one.  I know that This family has the love of God, of family and friends, and even people who have just met you.  I write to alleviate the pain of this, it is my outlet, at least with this I can cry and not have to explain why.  It is difficult to talk and keep from tearing up.  Even though I know I have friends that will be there just to listen, no explinations of any kind needed.  I find a kind of solice in writing,something I need to do more of, get back to.  I am scared, I need to get back into the Word, that is what is going to keep me balanced in this time.   

This has been a year of ups and downs, I pray the 2017 year holds nothing but blessings and greatness.  Just writing this, has calmed my soul.  looking out over these buildings, peaceful and calm.  seeing the colors of the trees changing as with this weather.  Hold the the ones you love close and tell them you love them.  We never know how things will change.  Be thankful for all you have and whom you have.  So, now the tears have dried up;and I can see clearly.  Time to get my strength and conquer this fear, to move forward and keep on keeping on, because mom needs to know and feel that we as a family has her, and is onboard with her well being.  That means I need to step up.  To grow beyond what I am, I know I can. 

This has been My Corner…  Until the next time.  Happy Thanksgiving . 

Beyond 365

Day 187:

Today I am…  Always Thinking.  Right now I am thinking about my next project that I want to do.  I know I will have photos included in this.  It will be photos I took my first year here in Austin, just have to think how I want that to go, and what photos I will add to them.  Always a thought in progress, then of course there is what I will do after Beyond 365, but that is still a bit off, and I am always thinking of different things.  Oh such an artistic mind I have, always scattered in different places, not quite rooted.  But always a work in progress I should say.  To be continued on this…

Well last night my mom decided that she was going to head back home today, just to keep ahead of the storms that are coming this way.  It is supposed to rain tomorrow, and she didn’t want to get caught up in it, there has been major storms around San Angelo as well, Tornado’s and thunderstorms.  So it is best she hit the road this morning, and head on back.  Her time spent here was very restful, she got rest, and we got some time, probably will not see her until sometime next month, but all is good.  She came here, and nursed me back to goodness, I am feeling so much better as well.  Now I just have to keep on top of things health wise.  This weather is crappy for asthmatics, so I need to do my best to stay healthy.

Well, off to enjoy the rest of my afternoon, got some movies to watch.  So hoping that you are enjoying yours as well.  Also Here’s to all the Father’s out there on this Father’s Day, may you enjoy it and cherish all that you have.

Today I am…  Always Thinking.

Beyond 365

Day 178:

Today I am…  Sorting it out.  The things in my mind that is, there are so many things rolling around in there, I just need to gather them and put them in the right places and spaces.  The weekend is upon us, and I am working it, hoping that I will have morning shifts this coming week.   Anyway, pretty much a short blog today, much sorting to do.  Enjoy your weekend.

Today I am…  Sorting it out.

Beyond 365

Day 31:

Today I am…  Contemplating.  On whether I should get myself a pet.  I know eventually I am going to get myself a cat, but for now I have been contemplating about a beta fish, I had one about 2 years or so ago.  Pickles, was a crown fin beta, he was red with blue, such a character he was, that beta had personality.  I was sad the day he died, but you know how fish are.  So I have been thinking about getting another beta.  For me it would be nice to come home to the apartment and have something to talk to, even though fish have no idea what you’re saying, it will keep me occupied at times, watching him swim around and I could have fun fixing a bad ass tank up for him.  I will give it a few more thoughts, before I make my final decision on the matter.

Today I am…  Contemplating.